Request Call Back

0113 320 6660 or

On Palm Sunday 1461, 50,000 Lancastrian and Yorkist soldiers battled at Towton. By the end of the day 28,000 lay dead.

The Lancastrians were eventually routed, and tried to escape down a grassy hill now known as Bloody Meadow.

The skulls show some discarded their heavy metal helmets to run faster, only to get an arrow in the head. Others kept them on, and were caught by the pursuing Yorkist swordsmen.

But here at Death and Disease we asked, what would you do? Keep your helmet on or throw it away so you could run faster?

Read on to see who would get naked, who was worried about spreading syphilis and find out if you won…

‘Helmet on’ won by a short head, including Becs who was worried her hair would look a mess (Frank empathises with you Rebecca) and Simon who, rather strangely, was worried about syphilis (thanks for sharing that with us Simon).

Chris and Kirsty came up with a cunning plan of taking their helmet off and throwing it at the pursuers before running away – killing two Yorkists with one helmet as the saying goes…

Other discarders included Robert and Deborah, who would run as fast as ‘my little Lancastrian legs would carry me.’

It would appear that Deborah would have been chased by James, who wanted to ‘kill ‘em all lad’. We are guessing James isn’t a Lancastrian, or a member of the Green party.

Ian would dive into the stream (which according to historical tomes ran red for three days) and use the old breathe-through-a-straw ruse. While Mark and Emma would crawl under a corpse and pretend to be dead. Hopefully you wouldn’t both choose the same one.

And finally Barrie and Jane would get naked and run towards their pursuers “blowing kisses” and “distracting them with my natural assets” respectively. I’m not sure we mentioned that it was snowing on the day of the battle which might not have been so favourable to the boys trying this technique…

The Winner

First to out-run the pack this week is James ‘hug-a-Lancastrian’ Harris. Congratulations! Please contact us to claim your prize. 

Prepare yourselves for next weeks Typhoid Mary Edition which (like Mary) we hope you will share with your family and friends.

Top